


Too Late

by TanyaReed



Category: Castle
Genre: Challenge Response, Dreams, Episode Related, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-03
Updated: 2013-01-03
Packaged: 2017-11-23 12:37:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 840
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/622215
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TanyaReed/pseuds/TanyaReed
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This was another one written for the Last Author Standing challenge.  It takes place after "Count Down".  Kevin's reaction to almost being too late.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Too Late

Love.

That was the first thing that went through Detective Kevin Ryan's mind. It wasn't horror or grief but a certainty that what he was seeing was a beautiful sculpture about the meaning of love.

The couple sat entwined, their arms wrapped around each other in affection, their heads lovingly resting together. For one brief second, Kevin felt like an intruder. This intimacy was something no one else should see.

He stood there, frozen, for a heartbeat. His body didn't feel the cold biting at his fingers and toes, and his mind refused to see reality.

Then Esposito, Kevin's partner, yelled, and Kevin drew in a breath. The world started again, and everything was awash with movement and confusion. Pain stabbed into Kevin's heart, and it wasn't because of the cold freezer around him.

He rushed forward with Esposito as his brain crashed into the reality he had been denying. He wasn't seeing a beautiful sculpture. He was seeing two of his best friends, friends who had been stranded for who knew how long in the freezer, wrapped together to fight the piercing cold. Though ice hung from their hair and eyelashes, and their skin was translucent gray, they were not made of ice. Somewhere underneath were fragile vessels of flesh.

Esposito reached them first. He knelt down, saying, “Beckett...Beckett...”

His hand touched her skin, brushing over it, and Kevin could see the same horror and fear that he knew must be on his own face.

With the pounding of sirens, the paramedics and one sleepy doctor they had called arrived. The medical personnel rushed in, gently pushing Kevin and Esposito aside. Josh, the doctor, and the only one Kevin knew, carefully examined first Beckett, then Castle. He didn't try to separate them, which Kevin thought was odd.

“Are they alive?” Kevin demanded, choking over the words. “Are they going to be okay?”

Josh turned to look at him. His face was almost the color of the freezer around them. The truth was in his eyes.

“We're too late.” His voice was so quiet that Kevin had to strain to hear him. “Maybe five minutes...maybe ten...we were so close...”

Kevin's next breath was more like a gasp. His knees began to tremble. He could hear someone saying, “...no....no...” and didn't know whether it was him or Esposito.

They were too late...They were too late. If only he had been faster or stronger. If only he had defied orders earlier. If only he had become suspicious without Alexis's call...if only...if only...

Beckett and Castle were dead because of him. He had not been good enough, and they had paid the price.

“I wasn't fast enough,” he mumbled, letting his legs collapse beneath him.

He didn't care if he was showing weakness. Their faces went through his mind, two of the best friends he had ever had. Now, they were gone. Their friends and their families would never see them again.

It was all his fault.

Kevin jerked awake, slightly disoriented. His face and his pillow were both wet, and he didn't have to wonder why. The tears were still falling, and his chest was tight and heaving. His body was shaking, and he bit his lip as he tried to bring everything under control. He didn't want to wake Jenny again.

“Kevin?” Her sleepy voice came to him, an anchor in his sea of horror and grief.

She turned to look at him, and he could see the faint outline of her face in the dim moonlight coming in their bedroom window.

“Kevin, are you okay?”

He couldn't answer her. He forced the lump from his throat and tried to shake off the image of Castle and Beckett permanently frozen in a loving embrace.

“You had that dream again, didn't you?”

Tender arms wrapped around him, and Kevin clung to the one thing he knew was real. He buried his face in Jenny's shoulder and took a deep breath. The solid reality of her stopped his tears as she gently ran her hand across his back.

“It's okay, Kevin,” she said softly. “It's okay. Remember, Sweetie, you were on time. Beckett and Castle are okay.”

He let her words sooth him, and, not for the first time, he was thankful to have her in his life. This was what true love really was. It wasn't a picture of two lovers. It was the day to day giving and support of someone who really cared about you. He didn't know what he would do without her.

Jenny gave him an extra hard squeeze and repeated firmly, “You were on time.”

He remembered now. He had been on time. He had saved Beckett and Castle. They were found in the same loving embrace as in his dream, but they were merely unconscious. They had gone on to save New York City, and that meant, in a way, that Kevin had saved New York City. All because he was on time.

He had not been too late.


End file.
